Battle for Bananafish

Battle Date: 1st of December 2008

I’m only getting around to writing this now (being the year 2012) so chances are I may not remember everything that happened.

The battlefield is laid out differently this time as the game mode has changed from ‘kill everything’ to ‘capture that and maybe kill everything at the same time’.

My objective was to capture the starfish of power from the clutches of the evil galactic empire (commanded by the malevolent Andrew). The empire’s goal was to steal back the banana of power…wait, I’ve used that one…the banana of evil from my cold icy droid grip.

Quick word on team stats, my droid army has only 1 armour as they are weak, but Andrews storm troopers have 3 armour because…well I dunno, they have suits on or something.

Also, last game I felt CP didn’t flow freely enough, so we jacked up the money on everything and made the teams special abilities (crazy game deciding moves) cheaper. No scattered CP, +3 cp for each frag, +4 cp for each capture. Team Specials are now 21 and super weapons and Super base upgrades are 25.

 To compensate for the lack of armour, the droid army’s hero, Darth Maul, is crazy overpowered.

 To begin with, I bought only the cheapest weapons and saved my remaining CP.

Players had to place the objective in the pod’s to win.

Andrew cap’s the laboratory, giving his occupied stormies +1 sk.

Freak, about time something happened. My droid frags a storm trooper as Darth Maul looks on in approval.

Andrew forgot this game has guns and proceeds to try and remember what they do.

First purchase by me. After capping Hump Hill, Lava mountain and the Tower of Burloch, I had enough money to buy a super base structure. It’s called Ore Drill, and it gives my team +10 CP every single turn. At this point both me and Andrew realised that maybe we added too much money to the game, but oh well.

Still wondering what these triggered things do, Andrew instructs his storm trooper to shoot a nearby droid. Sadly, but not so sadly, he misses. The stormie then finds himself ridiculed by his colleagues.

This game brought with it a heated ‘discussion’ about what droids bled.

I was amazed at Andrew’s strategy, dubbed: ‘Give Darth Vader all the heavy weapons and shields but keep him away from the enemy in case he hurts someone.’

Here comes one of the staples of our games, the Exploding Mobile Research Lab.

Slicey slicey!

More things happened:

Andrews research vehicle gets into the ‘research’ position.

Thankfully I have a useless droid ready to red shirt for ol’ Mauly.

Skeleton Horse gets in on the action.

It seems the the storm trooper below is stuck in the water, I’m unsure of why since I’m writing this four years after the game happened, but I’m confident it was for a good reason.

My invincible hero decides it would be best to run out into the open for a better look at who he can slice next.

Unfortunately Andrew’s storm trooper rolls a critical success and my Hero gets blown to smithereens.

And then he throws his cash around, buying a tie fighter and a medic pad. What an idiot!

Whereas I cleverly spent my money on defensive structures.

I also use my team’s special which is expensive but gives me 10 droids.

Here’s a dumb thing that happened that I hate: Andrew has re-spawned my dead hero into his team. This is most definitely a dumb.

This how the south side of the map looks at the moment, the Empire is bringing a tie fighter around the back of my base.

I’ve taken to protecting my banana with great caution. My banana is very important to me.

Because my banana is very important to me, I placed it carefully inside lava mountain.

Mean while my droids calmly ask for Andrew’s speeder bike.

Next I’ve build on my two capture points a portal gate.

Which four droids walk through bringing them into range of the Tie fighter.

With the speeder bike now in my possession I decide to make a mad dash for the glorious star fish by using the following good idea:

I catapult my speeder bike out of the portal…

…and crash land it underneath the tree house.

My droid just survives the crash.

Meanwhile the Tie fighter come crashing down onto the Tower of Burloch.

Crushing all droids and toppling the tower into the river of lava. This poses a problem for me. Not because my tower got broke, not because I just lost four units in one go, but because now the portal is in the lava…

…causing it to flow through to my base.

With Andrew done wrecking the place I buy a jedi star fighter a take the star fish with me.

Andrew also did this because he could:

My star fighter is fast, but not as fast as Andrew’s newly purchased scout. Using my Darth Maul, he pilots  the small ship into the sky…

…jumps out on my star fighter…

…and sabers up the wing causing a strange yet familiar crashing effect.

The battlefield is now littered with the husks of three ships.

And even my worse my prized starfish has landed in the lava.

Thankfully, blowing up my own stuff is still an option. My droids take aim at the shield generator and take out the supports. As it falls in to the lava it pushes the star fish into safe grabbing distance.

…Right next to my pod!

END GAME: Battlefield from Andrew's perspective.

And then from mine.

Here’s how the moves went this game: